Not Ready

AN- This is an updated version of my previous poem, Never Ready. This version was also published in my school’s literary magazine, The Mill.

Do you ever
get the feeling
that something
went horribly,
horribly wrong?

That you should have
let him go,
you should have
until you couldn’t fight
until your body sagged
and your bones cried out
for you to fall down
and just

That you made
the biggest mistake
of your life,
and now your heart
won’t pump
and your lungs
won’t pull
and your brain
is disintegrating.

That you’ll die
without him.

Think about it.
About him.

It was never about

It was about the warmth
of his smile
and the security
of his arms
and the purpose
it all gave you.

And really,
letting him go
was the best thing
you could ever do,
and though your soul
for that warmth
you’re not

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